A year ago today, Nic and I put into course the deeply painful decision to remove life support from our sweet baby girl. Oh, I remember those moments. I felt so sick. I felt like I was going to loose it. I wasn't ready, but I also knew it was what was supposed to happen.
A year ago today, nearly a year ago from this moment, life support was removed. It was the most terrifying moment. We were told she most-likely wouldn't make it.
But she did. She danced with Daddy. We took pictures as a family.
She made it.
And we brought her home on May 1st. We expected her to live for only a few days, if that long. She made it much longer than that.
And, in my mind, she is still a survivor. She lived a life centered on our Father in Heaven. She is our miracle. She is a perfect example of living a Christ-like life. "How?" you might ask... the truth is, I can't explain it. She and I communicated, spirit to spirit. There is no other way to explain.
A year ago, my little girl taught me a humility of the heart and spirit. She taught me that, even against all odds, with God, all things are possible.
I love you Baby Girl.
14 comments:
I can't believe it has been a whole year. Wow! What a perfect, beautiful example Mercydez was and still is, as are her parents.
We love you!
She was such a fighter! I can only imagine what she is doing on the other side! There is something special that only a mother can feel with her child, but you and Mercy had so much more than that.
I love your Vegas pictures. I'm glad that you were able to get away with your mom and grandma.
I love hearing about your memories with Mercy. Thank you for sharing, and being a wonderful example to Emil and I. We are blessed because of you.
Love you!
You guys were sure blessed, you got to keep your sweet princess for so much longer than you ever expected. I am so glad you are doing well. Looks like a blast in Vegas. I too love the memories you share on your blog.
What an amazing year! I remember when you brought her home, and I thought you were so brave and strong to do that. She gave you such a wonderful gift! I know what you mean about communicating spirit to spirit, and I believe that she is still communicating with you. I think about you often and hope that you're hanging in there. Please let me know if there is ever anything I can do! You're awesome!
Love you!
Hollie and Elaina too!
That is the hardest decision ever. We did the same with Elaine. No one should ever have to be in that situation. What darling pictures. It is amazing to me of how much these ones teach. Their lives may be short, but impact many others. Their missions must be completed, and they are such special kids they get it done quick... :) Mercydez sure was an example to us all. Can't wait to see you two tomorrow.
Melissa
Love those pictures! We are so excited to see you guys tomorrow and have a chance to visit and talk to everyone!(And I know exactly what you are talking about, speaking spirit to spirit.) :)
This is such a sweet post. I loved reading it. It touched me to my soul, especially today. I loved the last part where you said "against all odds, with God, all things are possible". I needed to hear that. I found out yesterday that my dad, my best friend, has cancer. I've been fighting so many feelings for the past 24 hours and tonight, as I'm about to go to bed I read your words. Thank you for your spirit and example. I appreciate it. I know your angel is being watched over.
I remember exactly where I was when I got the phone call from Carol telling me of your decision. I remembered how I prayed, how I cryed for you and your little angel. It was a sacred experience and I was so far away .... thank you for blessing our lives by sharing your sweet Mercy with us. Love you!
She is so beautiful. What a treasure she is.
We think of you and Nic often. We love you guys.
I look at these pictures and I am overcome with emotion. Your faces are so expressive. So much love. I just love you guys! Your daughter is amazing. But I don't have to tell you that...do I? Another thing my t-shirts are going to say is 'statistics mean nothing' I feel it is appropriate.
Ash,
You and Nic have always been my light in the darkness. I have always looked to you for advice, counsel, and example. I hope I never do anything to jeopardize my relationship with you two....or your sweet children.
I have such a deep love for you guys. I can't believe how time continues to move forward...so quickly..yet slow. I miss your precious baby, my sweetie. I have so much to pay back, as I have been blessed abundantly. I feel I will always be indebted to you and Nic for sharing Mercydez with me.
I miss her. I am so grateful she is ours for ETERNITY.
All my heart,
Aunt Addy
wow you hole fam r so strong so wonderful love u all
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